"I bought Heather a hat!" His face was blazing, his barrel-chest puffed out in pride as he presented the crumpled and dirty white hat to the room. Arlene could smell the tell-tale sickly-sweet scent wafting in waves from his mouth, clothes and skin.
Here we go.
"Bill, did you spend your paycheck on that hat? I need to buy diapers and milk." Time slowed as the words left her mouth. She felt her skin try to crawl inside to avoid the torrent she knew would come.
His eyes squinted nearly shut and his face turned the purple color she had come to dread. He threw the hat emphatically to the floor and raised the hand that had held it.
"Arlene, I swear to Gawd, can't you just let me enjoy one single thing?" His hand stayed aloft as he stomped on the hat.
"There! Now we don't have diapers, don't have milk and Heather don't have a new hat. You happy?"
Heather's timid face peered around the doorway. Arlene stepped back and to her left to bring Bill's gaze from her eldest daughter. "Is there any money left?"
The hand landed. Arlene fell against the sink with a thud. It had happened so many times before, she thought she shouldn't be surprised anymore, but everytime it hurt the same.
"No! There's no money left, banshee! Maybe if you ever did any work there would be!"
There's no money. I'll have to go empty-handed. So be it. "Of course, dear, you're right. Go put your feet up, I'll fix dinner."
"Damn straight you will and get me a gawddamn beer while you're at it.
After he downed his beer and a double-serving of boxed macaroni and cheese with hotdog pieces, Bill fell loudly to sleep. Not, however, before he could yell to Arlene that his dinner tasted like the ass-end of a skunk.
Arlene fed Allison, Hattie, Katie and Paul, got them cleaned up and put to bed, all the while aware of his rhythmic snoring. They were so quiet on nights like these. They seemed to know that to be a normal loud and enthusiastic child would be to invite danger, so they were silent and subdued. Thank god for that.
She told Heather the plan in a whisper as she packed two suitcases.
"All I need you to do is watch Bill. I ground up a pill and put it in his beer to make his sleep. Just watch him while I get the others into the car."
"What do I do if he wakes up?"
"I don't think he'll wake up, honey. Take this suitcase. Be very quiet. I'll bring down Allison and Paul first. I can trust them to stay in the car while I go get the others. Take that suitcase and get in the car after I bring Katie. Then I'll run back for Hattie and we'll go."
Heather held the suitcase but didn't move. Arlene knelt in front of her daughter and took her small shoulders in the palms of her hands.
"Baby, if he wakes we'll tell him that Allison and Paul have a fever and need to go to the doctor, we didn't want to wake him, so we thought we'd take them along. But he won't wake up. This time we'll get away and he'll never touch you ever again."
Arlene turned back to her silent packing. Heather watched her for a minute, then spoke again, softly. "What will it be like at the shelter?"
Arlene felt tears coming. "I don't know, baby. Probly loud. Probly horrible, but better than here. I promise to figure this all out. I promise no more stepdads. I'm so so sorry. I'll make it up to you. But right now we just have to escape. Can you be strong and help me?"
"Yes, momma. Don't worry."
Arlene closed the suitcase and latched it with a small click. She touched her battered cheek gently, thinking the bruise may help her plead her case at the shelter. She turned to Heather.
"Okay. We're ready. Go on, my brave soldier girl. Take up your post."
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